As our family gets bigger, and our energy supplier has decided that ours has been the elected household to supplement the world wide rising gas prices, I’m looking for ways to make money go further. So I have begun trying more of the basic-type ranges from the supermarket. Sometimes these are successful, and some are not. Sliced and grated cheese, garlic bread and big bags of unlabeled apples seem to work fine. My particular favourite is frozen peas. While we do eat a wide range of vegetables, I absolutely love the fact that there isn’t a meal is existence that can’t be bulked up in the green veg department by frozen peas. Spag Bol, a roast dinner, stir fries – you name it, you can add peas to it.

There have been a few disappointments too – the enigmatic bag of ‘citrus fruits’ can sometimes yield many wonderful seasonal varieties of small tangerines that are perfect for lunch boxes, or four large oranges that have to be cut with knives and are therefore not. I do wonder as well if the vague title means that one day we will find ourselves with a mixture of lemons and limes that we have no use for. The ‘frozen chicken pieces’ was another one. I presumed that some of it would be on the bone for variety, but no, all of it was on the bone – and more often than not, bone made up the majority of each piece. By the time I had cooked it to defrost and soften it, pulled all the meaty bits off (there’s a reason people generally don’t buy chicken wings unless they are coated with something that disguises the gristle) and recooked them into whatever meal we were having, I decided that it was benefitting us neither in time nor money, as there was less meat than buying fillets in the first place. So we’re going back to being wasteful 21st century town dwellers in that department and sticking to only buying the boneless white meat bit of the chicken(sorry farmers).

It has led me to being more creative in other departments too. The week before the school term started found me sewing up holes in the boys school jumpers where they had been chewed or – well, whatever else it is that small boys do that produces small holes in the middle of a jumper’s chest. And the trousers that I bought online for Turtle turned out to be massively long but rather than buy more, I have tightened the elasticated waist as snug as they will go, and hemmed the bottoms up, adding the words ‘You’ll grow into them boy.’ I am a dying breed, surely?

One idea that I’m sure will be brilliant, if it ever works out, is getting my hair cut for free. I haven’t had my hair cut for a whole year now, which is definitely a record even for me, so I hit upon the idea of asking the salon I normally go to if they need victims people for their trainees to practice on, and they said yes. Models (I think ‘guinea pigs’ is probably a more apt title) are needed on Wednesday nights for teaching purposes, so I figured it would solve both my hair-cutting issues at once; I don’t have to pay money for it, and they will choose how I have it cut so I don’t have to make a decision on what I want. Perfect. The only trouble is that the appointment has been moved twice now as staff go on holiday or have guest speakers in for training purposes, so I’m not sure if I’ll still be waiting this time next year with twice as many split ends for an available slot to finally come up.

Finally, my piece de resistance, today in the post, I received three brand new pairs of trainers, one each for the older boys, for free. That’s right, for free! One of my online mum friends told me about this website that had a few factory seconds that they were giving away for just the price of the postage. I dubiously looked at it, and was surprised that not only did I actually really like the designs, but their limited stock covered the exact sizes we needed - and they normally sell for over £30 a pair! When they arrived we were even more impressed that they are called ‘Inchworms’ and – get this – they can grow to a whole size bigger! That’s right, should the shoe last through a whole season of small boy abuse, they can be adjusted so they last the next season too! Can you tell I’m excited?!?

You’ll be pleased to know that we won’t always have to live frugally though. In recent discussions with the boys we’ve asked them what sort of job they’d like to be aiming for in the future. After much thought, Turtle has opted for a museum night guard, because ‘It’s really easy to do’, Scooby wants to work at McDonalds (what better way to make someone’s day than serving them food?), and Crash has his sights set on farming, which in this country is a really good stable industry with a promising.....wait. No......